I just don't know

BULL! BULL BULL BULL IT'S ALL A BUNCH OF BULL!

Okay no it's not. I am very close to tears right now so you know what has happened. I really don't think I need to explain. I am going to end up crying for a good part of the night so don't expect me to be on anything a lot.

On the 26th of April too. The day right before my birthday. Oh how many tears I shall shed. Hopefully that day that we planned for the park will stay the same. We can invite all of the people who would come now and just make it a closed picnic instead of one open to the public. Maybe we can see everyone together again. I don't know, I just don't know.

I don't want to lose my family and I don't want to lose the people I love. I can't stand the thought of it. It's too much to bear. How did this happen? Could no one see the signs? We all just chose to ignore it and look where we ended up.


Why won't it rain?
Kay

P.S. I don't doubt that this isn't God's fault. He hasn't done anything wrong. It is the people that have caused this church family great pain & now with the fact that we are more then likely going to split to multiple churches scares me. I know that God isn't the accused and He has done nothing to me except love and care for me so I am not mad at Him. No, I am mad at myself & at the upper boss people. They should have told us earlier!!!!!

Love

Love is like fire,
It spreads quickly throughout us,
Love is a liar,
We feel what we know is wrong,
Love is like pain,
You will never go a day without it,
Love is like rain,
One minute the skies are clear and it looks like there's no hope and the next you're being poured on,

Love is something special...
and we all take it for granted. We live on through each day and go through the motions, through the feelings. We don't stop and tell the people we care about the most how much they mean to us. We don't tell them that we love them.

We care, we pray, we hope, but do we really love? How do we show this then? What can we do to prove our love for them? We can't. God will give us a time to do this, we just need to be open & ready for it. It's difficult to know when this is happening. However, this is only my perception of love.

Love is a special word that always means something different to each individual. I can't tell you what love is, I can't show you what love is like, all I can do is give you my interpretation.

I love many people in my life with a deep passion, one of family, but closer. They are called my friends and I truly don't think they know just how much I love them. I would sacrifice my life for any and all of the them. I love them all, but I don't think they know how much.

& it's very likely that they never will.


I wish it would rain.
Kay

Show

I am not happy, but instead of spilling my guts out and telling everyone my plans I am going to sit down, shut up, and stuff my face with pop and popcorn. Period.

♥Kay♥

Metaphor for thought

So far in your life, you have been following in the footsteps that everyone has taken, when one day there is a fork in the path of sand. You can follow the multitudes of footsteps or the path with just a few. The multitudes of footsteps go across smooth flat earth. The right path has rocky sand with sharp stones and hills in the distance. You always could just turn and make a brand new path.
Where will you go? What path will you follow?

In any of these paths, Jesus is with us as He always is.

RESULTS:
Our human nature tells us to take the left path, the smooth earth and many footsteps tell us it is safe. This path also takes us twice as long to get to the end because half of the time we don't realize who we are with or where we are going.

The right path is much harder. We must face all of the challenges before us but we see others who have done it before. It gives us strength and courage to go on.

We, of course, could always make a new path. This is much harder but very rewarding. This path allows us not to follow Jesus, but walk beside him. Fighting to make new footsteps so one day, maybe some one else, can get just a little bit farther.

♥Kay♥

On my journey through life...

I have stopped to catch my breath. What surrounds me is darkness through and through. Yet a small stream of light pokes through the darkness and I know, that is where I am to go. That little source of light is where I am to be, and if I stop now, I will be lost forever in the darkness.

Okay don't ask, I felt like being all author-ish right now. Hopefully it worked, maybe I'll inspire some one. But until then it's a cute little paragraph.

Thoughts, I have too many of them

I have wayyyy too much time on my hands. Period.
I overthink things, especially the actions of people. Rawr
I overwonder about people, esp. my church family. (some people are like songs, they might be really cetchy but when you can't get them out of your head they get pretty annoying no matter how awesome they are)
I overinterpret things, esp. the thoughts of people.
I overwant things, esp. the attention of people.
I overneed things, all I should need is God. Seriously
Yeah
Way, way, too much time. I need to get out more >.<
But you know, if people lived closer to me I wouldn't be having this problem. Or even if people were just able to stay over more that would be cool.
Rawr
Rawr
Rawr
Rawr
I'm confused...
I'm tired...
I'm hurt...
I wonder...

Ragtime, Enter The Guardsman, & 1776

Are the top musicals I have stuck in my head. On Sunday I was so excited, I was able to be see Ms. Christine in "Enter the Guardsman" I thought it was great, definstely well put together although some choreographic things could have been different I accept that. I loved it, not my favorite musical, but that doesn't stop it from being awesome.
Probably the best part was I waited until afterwards and then Ms. Christine signed the program. So yeah that was Sunday. We found a sharpie at fuddruckers afterwards. Go figure.

Songs of the day:
1) Ragtime - 52 annual tony awards (YouTube)
2) Sit Down, John - same as above
3) Language of Flowers - Enter The Guardsman (no YouTube ):